mrs. h- Hi! i was so glad to see you posted!!!! i have been to hell & back these past few weeks. my h told me just a couple of days before my mom died that he was not coming home because he could not trust me...just before he told me in Jan. that he was coming home, i had started talking to a man & had formed a very strong friendship- the man & i had never seen each other & were going to meet (w/ a chaperone). well, i was honest w/ h about the relationship from the beginning. at first, he was o'k then he became angry. well, the day of mama's funeral, he told D13 to tell me i looked very pretty that day-he also told me the same. things started moving in a positive direction for a reconciliation. h started coming around, bringing supper, etc....we were getting along really well. on V-Day, h called & wished me a Happy V-day. we talked, he told me about a possible new job which would put him home on the weekends, i wished him luck-he said it was for "us". that night he told me he loved me. we spent all day thurs. together-grreat time. that evening, after he left, i got an anonymous phone call that h is living w/ another woman-his plant manager. at first he denied it; then, admitted it. said he was unhappy & had been wanting to come home. i agree to let him....we both take the next day off work. spend the night talking & trying to work things out. the next morning, h decides he does not want me to go w/ him to get his things-says he doesn't want a confrontation. he puts my wedding ring back on. he makes all kinds of promises....says all the right things....then because i referred to his mistress as a bitch, he gets mad & leaves. tells me later that he's not coming back, that he doesn't love me like he should and that he loves her. he chose her over me & our kids (she left her h & i guess her 2 small children for my h). from what i can tell, she has been paying all "their" bills, rent utilities, etc. now, she has supposedly lost her job-maybe because of their relationship & my h is probably going to lose his too. i did a stupid thing this morning & called him and told him i loved him and i'm sorry (i kinda showed myself a little yesterday afternoon when he came to get his things-all he got was a gun)...then, i drove to his apartment to get his apartment # so i can somehow get proof they are living together...he comes out of the apartment...of course, she would not come to the door or show her face. i have not heard from h since. i came home & started bagging his things up, and cried again...i cried all day yesterday...i was so close to having what i wanted and it was snatched away from me again. i am planning to contact a lawyer monday to make sure the kids & i are took care of if he does lose his job. given his track record, i can't help but wonder if he will try to come home again.
i guess i am just glutton for punishment...i should have learned my lesson by now...sad thing is i still love him.
