Still in the fight

[81388*]

FT180;
I have done pretty well at let go, as far as not fighting and just validate and detach, I have been very supportive and have accepted the role of friend. I know that I need to be patient, but the whole thing just seems stuck.

W has not given any indication that she wants anything other than 1)get a job(done) 2)move out(looking) 3)time divorce so that OM will be local by the time D is final. In the mean time she is content to stay here and eat cake.

Unfortunately, up til last night, things had been pretty good, a relative term anymore, but really quite nice. We had been talking more I had been helping her with transition to new job, we had been joking around and it felt really good.

As I look back on it, last night was in the works from the moment I walked through the door. I know it had next to nothing to do with the purchase.(although she did have some valid gripes about that.) Even though she had been upbeat, she had been pushing about the D, her w4, taxes, what will she do about child support,etc. I had done really well, "I don't know what to tell you, maybe we could find someone who might know", or "I don't know the answer to that one, maybe you could find something online", plus she was back to wearing a glaring reminder of OM, a gift she got over NYE week long vacation with that POS.

Well she left this AM with no goodbye, just walked out saying "see ya later" to S6 w/out even looking at him. On the up side, this is going a long way towards helping me detach.

If this is the next phase, she can't move out soon enough. Most of the evening the kids were asking "where is Mom?", "what is Mom doing?" What so you say?, she had to run to town, she is out for the night, she is having a mental breakdown.

Up until last night, I agreed w/ the conventional wisdom on this BB that it was better to have them home if at all possible, but now I am not so sure.