Id like to hear one HDW in here who wouldnt love for her H to pick her up throw her over his shoulder and stomp up to the bedroom with the intention of having his way with her, while she struggled and 'wrestled' against him. I would love to see GGB do that. or just blow thru her resistance by 'teasing' her up and down to having a real O or just pinning her down and 'making' her O. shrug. all in good time.
That takes a lot of 'guts' for a man to do and then figure out if she really doesnt want it, or if she is just 'playing' or insecurely objecting. It takes even more for a guy who wants to be 'respectful' 'nice' and not push her 'boundaries' when she is saying 'dont do that'. If a woman believes my 'dont do thats' she'll never have a chance. She has to have a butt load of confidance in who she is as a woman.
Putting yourself in the face of rejection and then not personalizing it, if and when it comes is a real demonstration of strength and self assuredness.
Really great description complete with the caveat of making sure that the woman really wants it. I've actually said a similar version of this before. And what a great description of showing how it goes both ways between men and women.
Oh and one additional caveat - if you are seriously thinking of trying this, man or woman, please think about the timing issue. If your guy truly wants to come home and have 30 minutes of down time watching ESPN/ Nightly News, or working out, or whatever, That is NOT the time to seduce him. The same goes for men. If your wife has certain needs like washing dishes immediately after dinner, having time to drink afternoon tea and read a book, etc., that's not the time to try either. At least not in relationships that are in the healing process. i know I was being a bit stereotypical but my main point was not setting yourself up for failure just by ignoring things your spouse has already told you. This is directly from Michelle and I love this description because I was terrible at doing the same thing. She used to try to talk to her husband at certain times of the day even after he told her he didn't like talking x,y, and z. She finally decided to just listen to his request and not have him justify why he didn't want to talk x,y, and z. The same thing here. if your spouse has said, "I like to have x time to do y thing after z thing" (is that neutral enough??) then sure as heck don't ak them to do "p" thing at x time during y thing. Is that clear as mud?
Anyway this also kind of dovetails into my theory that men are wrong when they say that women don't want nice guys (very similar to the men love b!tches theorem and just as "wrong") . That's simplifying the choice into 1) Nice guy and 2) Bad Boy. But my interpretation is that many guys who think they are "nice" are actually pushovers. Nice guy in my book does NOT equal pushover (and nice girl shouldn't equal pushover either). So the #3 MAN is the real choice - Sweetheart of a man WHO isn't a pushover and is confident in who he is. That is the real Man that most women want.
In my opinion the only type of women that truly want "Bad boys" are women with emotional and psychological issues. (A professional baseball player whose name escapes me and his wife have talked about their own relationship issues on a similar subject. She had had issues and past abusive boyfriends and was falling into a trap of trying to escalate arguments between them into physical confrontations because it was all she was used to. This MAN was strong enough to see what she was doing AND to not fall into the trap of a) abusing her the way she was baiting him to or b) becoming a pushover to try to help her and appease her. Instead he, in one instance, pulled over the car, stepped out and said(I'm paraphrasing off the top of my head), "I am not going to react to this the way you are pushing me to. You need to KNOW that I love you. I will not tolerate this but I will not yell and physically abuse you. You need to deal with this issue. I will be here for you but I will not tolerate living like this" He was dedicated to her and loved her but you could tell that he was strong enough that he wouldn't tolerate that way of life. Thankfully I think she reacted to this #3 Man. The guy who was nice enough to love and respect her but strong enough to love and respect himself.
All right confession time. I've had three cups of regular coffee today after 2 months of decaf. Is it obvious?
Anyway... If these are incoherent, babbling posts with no redeeming value, I apologize in advance. (See, i still have my own work to do because I tend to put myself down as a pre-emptive strike.)
But what is happiness except the simple harmony between a man and the life he leads? ~Albert Camus
