I am very glad to hear that you have taken the first step in confronting your wife (MrsNOP keeps me up to date on everyone).
The only thing I would add is that you not forget that you are doing this for the relationship, not just to get what you want. Ultimately, the relationship will be the issue.
I want to suggest that you stop couching your decisions made concerning your daughter as "omissions", and that you stop allowing your wife to assume you are a liar because it is more comfortable for you to be considered a liar than to confront her with your decisions.
Take back your finances, HD, and prove that you can handle them with integrity. There is no reason you should force your wife to handle your mistakes.
Now that it's hot, stir the pot.
All the best, -NOPkins-
I will ferret out an affair at any opportunity.
-An affair is the embodiment of entitlement, fueled by resentment and lack of respect. -An infidel will remain unreachable so long as their sense of entitlement exceeds their ability to reason.
