H came last night at 6:30ish. S4 and I had made meatballs, so we had a nice pasta and meatballs dinner together as a family. I put the kids to bed, then H and I watched Grey's Anatomy (it was the bomb episode from last year.. but I digress).
At 10ish, we went to bed. I assumed that H would have wnated some lovin'. But after we went to bed, I rolled to his direction thinking he would then initiate. He didn't. So, I rolled over and went to sleep. Not sure if he wnated me to initiate and he was testing me, or if he really wasn't intersted. Whatever.
So, I am "as if'ing". This morning, I rolled over and hugged him. I am acting as though he wants me in his arms. But not overdoing it. After a bit, I got up and got the kids. Then we were all in bed. Then I went downstaris with the kids.
Then I went back up and crawled back into bed with H and just laid with him for a few minutes and chatted. I just wanted to show him that I wanted to be close to him. After a few minutes, I went back downstaris because S4 was calling for me.
I then made H tea (he has a cold) and I let him be alone in bed whiel the kids and i were down here. I little while later, I went back up and jumped back into bed with him and he was just watching some repeats of stuff that I had DVRd.
He's now getting coffee and bageld with S4. I am acting as thought things are normal. I suggested we all go to Home Depot today and work on teh house. I told him i had a project in mind for him... to fix the door in the basement.
So, things are okay... not great, but not terrible. WHenever I feel that H is pulling away, I try to show him some love in some way or another, but I'm not overdoing it.
And I haven't asked about OW in weeks now.
Also, the kids and I painted pictures yesterday that we're going to sneak into H's bags before he leaves for his Biz trip on Monday. It's somethign I used to do long ago when he went on trips that I've recently started going agaion. The last few times he's gone away, I've put somethign that the kids and I have made into his bag.... just so he knows how much we love him.
