Yes, this last remark of yours (that Cobra notes), Heather, sticks out in my mind too. I suspect I am looking at it differently than Cobra.
I think it is a prediction based on your H's past behaviors and is probably an accurate assessment. I also think that it might have been part of what led to your A also - this kind of thinking pattern on his part and yours. Low expectations of each other that existed before the A. He thinks to himself, amidst Heather's pleas for whatever was missing from the R at that time, "Oh, that's just Heather, blah, blah, blah...I can't be the guy she wants, I can't change her mind about me and our M. If she's unhappy. She's unhappy." Meanwhile, Heather thinks, "Look, I've begged, pleaded, screamed, written notes, H obviously has made his statement that he won't step up to the plate and meanwhile Mr. X has made it clear that I am worth some effort." Why is this important now Heather? Because if you are to have a healthy R in the future you must be aware of what the cycle of apparent "indifference" (I actually think it might have been more like shame and feelings of inferiority) will do to YOUR feelings of hope, resolve, and ability to get past these issues.
Heather, I hope your H listens to your note. Barring that I hope you have a wonderful, happy life, and meet someone who can grow along with you.
