Awesome, Jen! Although...I don't know that saying yes when you want to say no is the right approach....

Let me see if I can explain. If it's something that's *really* not your business to give permission for, then you need to look at your H and say, "You don't need my permission; are you really asking my opinion?"

If H is asking for your opinion, then you need to be honest. Use "I" messages. Example:

H: "Uh, Jen? I'd like to know what you'd think about me getting a second penis. I'm thinking about getting surgery to get one."

Jen: "Well....I can see how you might be interested in having two. However, since you've asked me my opinion, I want to be honest with you. Personally, I don't like it. I think it might look a little odd, and I don't see what benefit a second one might have. What is the second one doing while we're ML? Are you thinking it might get worn out and you'd need a mid-sex replacement? Maybe if you explain your thinking I could see your point of view...."

Get it? Rather than saying, "Eeeeeeeeeew! Isn't one enough? And if you THINK you're sticking the second one in THERE, you've got another thing coming!!!!"

Sorry...went off on a tangent....gosh, I have a really warped mind. But you get the point, right?

You rock!

SD

Me: 40
H: 43
H had EA from 2/06-9/06
Bomb 5/06
Piecing since 9/2006
3/2008: Boundary setting
7/2009: Boundary crossing~dropped my own bomb.
8/2010: Marriage finally on track!