But coming from a dysfunctional past, that statement would sound to me like it has a certain air of confrontation to it, that my wife would be putting squarely on my lap the need to in turn assert my plans and whether I would be willing to help do yard work with her or not. It requires that I step up to maintain my boundaries, and I may not want to do that. If I choose not to help, then I am worrying whether she will get mad and sour the atmosphere which could then lead up to another fight. It is avoidance, I don't deny that, but let's be real what what we are dealing with here.
If you truly believe this, then you've just negated, in my eyes, everything that you've been saying to Hairdog.
