So many problems...

[Jack_Three_Beans]

Im, you seem to be in a pretty good way with you and your wife, and you seem to be in a pretty good way for well you.

I like what you said about not trusting one view of advice to much. The best thing is to take the pieces of advice from others that fit you and yours.

Don't worry abouting being Jack Nicholson.

Is this an MLC? Read the resources at the top, you have a much better feel and know about her past more than anyone else here, did she have some substaintial problems growing up? Usually a good indication for an MLC later in life.

Give her the space she needs, and I think right now with that much time together in the house, give yourself some space too. Go out by yourself or with friends.

She wants to get out of your shadow and lost her sense of self? ummm...the problem with you brining up ideas to her about this is ... she would be living in your shadow if you suggested going to school or taking classes or persuing a hobby she loves.
By maybe not if you you only offered and didn't follow up or push.

The whole sex thing. Drop it, honest man please take it from me.Become celibate, unless she makes advances, and then be the most caring wonderful guy in the world. Don't even imply anything.

IM, sorry; your married, but you ain't. Your world has changed and will continue to do so. Consider sex a sacrifice right now.

As for the therapist. One of those things thats you simply cannot control. Totally against DBing you could find out if the therapist is pro marriage, but that is about all.

Regardless, she needs to work on her, the therapist isn't going to hurt in that area; and right now you do not know if this is going to be good or bad for your marraige.

Thats down the road.

By the way, be her geeky friend. You don't lose anything, that you haven't lost already.