(I laughed when she said "I can't change my feelings"...a snort really, it just flew out...at least it wasn't "the F you CAN"T!")
I love that one as well. So....your feelings for me have already changed, but they 100% can't ever change....again?
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Last night she was back on the topic of family vacation and today I get "are you ready for me to look for a place"...HELP!!!! This just seems like such a weenie way to have somebody else make her decisions for her. Then she's blameless in the end because it wasn't up to her.
I think you've pretty much hit the nail on the head there. You've gotta figure a way to tell her that she's a big girl and can make her own decisions, because you aren't going to make them for her. If she wants to leave so bad, then she can suck it up and leave all on her own.
Like utterly_alone said though, if you tell her to leave, you've gotta be prepared for her to actually leave. If she does, she'll see it as a permanent move, but we know that that won't necessarily be the case. Hell, maybe when she isn't in the position to have her cake and eat it too anymore, she'll wake up and realise what she's losing a have a change of heart.
She's really not stable enough to be out there alone though, so I can see why you'd want to not give her that kind of ultimatum.
Me:30 H:30 Together:10yr H left:Oct3'06,couple weeks before 5th wed anniv. No Kids OW bomb:Jan19'07 My thread: He filed.
