LL: About a month ago i was thinking too much about ex OW... bc it was a year after our separaton, a year after his affair, a year after OW birthday which i found out... a year after his alone birthday without me... So, my thoughts were refresh... the hurt was refresh... and i thought about hiring the service of detective to follow my h just to know if he continue seing her...!!... and in that moments i think about the words my c gave me: Any relation... with or without problems... have a part of unsure, of not knowing what the other part is doing... and the key is learn to live and handle a relation even with that doubt... My c talked about a 15% of unsure... We cant know everything, evry move about our h as many many couples cant neither...!!... And not bc we lived what we had lived, we have to stop learning to live with that, giving them the befit of the doubt...!!... By the contrary, if we want to rebuild our marriage we need to learn living with that...!!... as we lived before this bomb explode...!!... It is completely normal to feel what you are feelings, to have doubt about your h feelings for you and for her... this feelings will be less and less... and i hope as you we can feel more secure and more love by them as time pass and we heal that past completelly, or at least, at a level we can handle...!! (excuse my english, im spanish)
