steph,
If I am giving a clinic on anything it's how to keep screwing things up by doing the wrong things!! ha ha!!

no in all seriousness... yes it does seem to be true that when you "detach" "they" tend to come back... it is not until you become a whole person once again that you can have a healthy r anyway... it is hard for me because I am still at home with the kiddos but I am doing my best at getting a life of my own once again... honestly this "crap" was the best thing that could have happened in my life... it has given me an independance that I lost when I became a mom... it has shown h what it is that I do here all day with the kids, (h spent sundays alone with them...did not happen til separation)

h is still torn... but I see more and more that this is where he wants to be... I can only hope... but if not at least I know I will survive.
LL