I just discovered that my H has gotten involved with his secretary. Oh how special that is, as I used to call to check in every day at 1:00 to see how his day was, etc. and she would answer and would be SO pleasant. Come to find out about 8 months or so ago, SHE was telling HIM how lucky I was that I was married to him - well, lets' blow smoke up that guys' behind and see how much he smiles!
The reality is - I was TOO good to my h; I took care of it all; I tried to listen to him about his job, etc. -but he RARELY talked about anything emotional; in fact, I don't think he can have emotions or maybe is just uncovering some from his childhood - hence a MLC. He would not talk about us, his feelings or anything about the marriage and even the kids were a pain to him and treated all of us as second class citizens. He not only mistreated US, but thinks her shooting him in the eye with a rubber binder was funny - now if it would have been one of us, we would have gotten a 30 minute lecture on how dangerous that is. Let's see, then he takes our new motorcycle into work last fall (the one that I spent hours tracking down and using special friends' to get a discount on the damn thing) and gives the bimbo a ride on it - OUR motorcycle - yet if I would take a male in my car to lunch he would have had a fit...DOUBLE STANDARDS or LOOSE MORALS??? Neither, my h was the most faithful man ever - in fact, when I found out about him going to a nightclub w/work related visitors (designated driver)- he was very concerned about my feelings and told me that "he had everything right here that he ever wanted" and that it was nothing more than driving these guys there. I believed him then and know that that is my REAL husband.
Wouldn't you say that some folks are just a reject in this department - and if so, why do I have to bear the brunt of his rejection of not only himself, but our beautiful kids too. In my opinion, there is NO EXCUSE for an affair.
