Sounds like your marriage isn't dead. There's life in it.
The only way through this is to attract him back.
The best way to do this is Get a Life. Take care of yourself.
James made an excellent point about our spouses contolling our happiness. As long as they feel that way, they will feel suffocated and repusled. They may actually like the control. But...if we are happy, joyful and fulfilled in ourselves, then we are more likely to draw them back.
I know about the tears. I have a place I can run to, not too far from my office, where I can have a good cry. It's a Catholic Church and always open. And be patient with yourseld. Yuo will have days when you can't hold on. And the feelings will cycle through: sadness, denial, bargaining, anger, etc.
James...I find that my wife is reacting the same way to my buoyancy and happiness. She's getting depressed and closing in on herself.
