I think I've finally figured out some key dynamics in our R, and am looking forward to developing a strategy for tweaking some of them in my next session with the counselor. I'm feeling a lot more clarity, but am at a loss as to the best way to address the issues. Or if I should.
I know that I need to give H his space and time...but I feel strongly that he is taking advantage of said time, and is persistently ignoring the significance of our current sitch. H's personality is so comfort-oriented...he does not make changes just for the sake of changing, and displays little desire to really move forward in our R. Really, he's got it good right now: tons of time to work on his projects, a wife giving him space, but providing him with food and fun when he wants it, no parental responsibility beyond fifteen minutes here and there.
Of course, this is all my assumption. Sigh. It's all I have to go on right now.
Where exactly is the fine line between loving detachment and respect? Respect as in: earning H's and my own--I am a notorious push-over. We both know it. H most definitely uses my insecurity against me. I guess for me, this is the part of GAL/180 where I need to make some changes. I just want to make sure those changes are positive ones.
Good news: today he called and asked if I thought he should put off his work trip until after V-Day, which I most certainly agreed would be very nice. He seems quite reluctant to leave (a huge change from pre-bomb), which is definitely a super-positive thing. Yay H!
