One way you might do this is by keeping the sex issue on the front burner – could he associate your need to have sex with all his other shortcomings and guilt, sort of a Pavlovian response? If so, what could you do to short-circuit this recurring cycle?
Well, I haven't initiated sex in monthes so I really don't think I've been keeping the sex problem on the front burner. I gotta tell you to me it seems like whatever I do put on the front burner is what we're going to end up having problems with. He has told me that he knows that he loves me because he hates to disappoint me. Maybe on some level he is choosing to disappoint me in order to feel his love. He feels closest to me when I am hurt because then my feelings are more in sync with his down near the abyss.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
