Letting Go

[poohbear]

I have come to a point in my life where reality has set in. I was talking to a fellow member of my church who has been through similar crises with her spouse. She is divorced now. But she is happy. And she did try. Her H was a WAH.

I was speaking to her about prayers and happiness. Our church has been passing around a sheet for each member to put prayer requests on and submit for the other memebers to pray for you. I was considering what to submit. It has dawned on me that all this time, I think I have been praying for the wrong thing. I have been praying for my M and for my W to come back to it. At the same time, she may be praying to end the M. Does God have to decide who's wish to fulfill?

I think you can be too specific when you pray for things. It's like praying to God for the winning lottery numbers, and then feeling God let you down because you didn't get them. But why are we praying for the winning lottery numbers? What do you want to do with the money? Shouldn't you be praying for God to provide you with a path to happiness, even if you feel the money will make you happy? Because you may realize at some point that you can and will be happy with or without your winnings.

That's where my reality comes in. I realize that I have been praying for the wrong things. I have been praying for my M because I believe that's what will make me happy. But there are other things that can and will make me happy, with or without the M. So, instead of praying for my M to be restored, I have determined I will pray for my happiness as well as my W's happiness. I pray for God to deliver me from my hurt and resentment, as well as my W's. I pray for my children's well being. I pray for all these things to happen, with or without my M being restored. At this point, my family's future well being is primary. If my M should be restored, that would be great. If not, my life will go on. I WILL BE OK. LIFE WILL GO ON.

God Bless