I know I need to wake up and put you before me and love you and stop holding back but I nver do ,, I am always acting guarded around you and smiling thru the pain I am trying so hard to puish it out and at the same time I hold onto it for dear life and it is eatng me alive.... I want to love you to wake up in the morning and just be and hug and kiss you like you are my partner for life and then the fear just holds me back I stans still and do nothing but profess my great love for you. It is there in my heart but you can not feel it....
and I am hurting you everyday making you feel so ugly,, when to me you are so beautiful,, how do I stop?
I am so scared I wil never get this right and you will never feel the beautiful love I feel for you,, and you will leave with your heart still hurt ..... you also never let me in too afraid for me to keep being scared and NEVER start showing you my love,, I alwasys hold back and tell myself I wil not do that and then when you are in front of me for one day I let you feel it and then I go back into my cave and wait for you to magically feel all the love I have for you..
Why oh why do I keep it all inside when I love you so much and want you to feel me?
