The first day of your new life where H doesn't make you strong or weak, happy or sad, valuable or unvaluable. Let this be the beginning of you slowly breaking away from the mess and getting on with some things that truly bring you joy.
I'd really like to win the lottery. Really would. It would make things so much easier. I buy a couple tickets each week just in case I would get lucky. But you know what? There are times I forget to even check my numbers. And I don't think about those tickets prior to the drawing, I just kind of carry them around in my wallet. Wondering if I win or not? Only when I'm actually checking the numbers. Doesn't occupy my thoughts, doesn't ruin my day if I lose, doesn't cause me anxiety in the days leading up to the drawing of the numbers.
Well...whether or not I ever have a life with my wife again is pretty damned close to being like whether or not I will ever win the lottery. So that's how I treat it now. I'm still carrying the "tickets" around inside, but I don't think about them everyday. I check them every once in awhile to see if I've won, but I don't get too worked up when I realize I haven't. And I don't spend the days paralyzed wondering whether or not I'm going to win. If it happens, it happens. If it doesn't, well there is still a life out there I'm trying to live.
So happy birthday pws! I know you wish the circumstances were different, but this very well could be the beginning of something new and wonderful in the year ahead.
Blessings,
Bill
"Don't tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon."
