Well, Whatis was in one pissy mood today! I can't remember being so angry and sullen for a whole day like this. I guess W's little discussion with girls about us going on a family cruise in March ticked me off. Firstly, she didn't bother to discuss it with me, secondly, where was the money to come from! Thirdly, I had just told her two weeks ago that this little arrangement cannot continue for much longer. So, what does she do? Plan a family vacation!!! Tonight I told her to forget cruising anywhere. Of course, she can't understand where the money went! I showed her the bills and listened to her remarks which subtly indicated an ineptness on my part. This was one of her little bugaboos that I "controlled" the money (so she started stashing some money from her paycheque away in case I took off and cleaned out the bank account!). My control is basically that I pay the bills. I wrote up a budget for her, as she requested, last time this came up and she never bothered to read it and comment on it, as I had asked her to do. Anyway, dream vacation is off. Maybe I can use this in some way to work on a togetherness budgeting plan? Or maybe I'll just sell the b!tch and use the cash to retire our small debt. Next thing was that D13 wanted to go to a movie and the mall with her girlfriends today. I went to talk to W about it last night and she snarkily said "I don't care what she does" and stormed off, D had been hounding her about it before I got home. This morning I approached her again, because I know damn well she cares, and got more attitude in the guise of questioning my thoughts regarding this, in a condescending tone she said "So you were against her going before, but now you are OK with it, how does that work" It's like we can't discuss the issue like two parents, it feels like some kind of chess match. Finally I said "could you please just make your point " and of course she denied having a point! It was like pulling teeth to get any kind of helpful input. God knows why I stay and put up with this b!tch. She deserves to be alone. sometimes I just feel like driving her teeth down her snarky little throat (especially today) and, of course, I never would! I've really just been trying not to blow today, I came close a couple of times but I'm very aware of the damage a blow up would do, and I don't want the kids to hear that ever again. It happened once in the summer where W and I were screaming horrible things at each other and the kids witnessed it all. I promised them that it would never happen again. I kept my word today. I guess that's a victory. I just felt so damn angry today!
