Warning: VERY LONG. My SITCH. Is it too late?

[geordie]

4ever,

Good to see your PMA! It seems to me like H may be trying to "punish" you, to make you feel some hurt.....the staying out late, coming home from the trip later than supposed to, etc. I know when I get mad with my H I just think "what the hell" and don't bother to tell him I won't be home for the weekend (Fri and Sat are when he sleeps off his night shift at our house - the only time he sleeps in our bed). I do it because he is having his cake and eating it so why should I care about him....of course it never works ...but without finding DB I think I would have done it since finding out about the A. Now I rarely do it. It also speaks on some level the hurt he is feeling too - if he didn't care about you then he wouldn't be behaving in this way.

You are doing so well by CHOOSING not to feel the pain from his actions. That's very empowering for you. Keep it up....it's the only way forward. You have to interact with H because of your D so make sure that EVERY interaction is good and you laugh together about what cute things D does. Easier said than done I know but it really does help. Hope things go OK on his return.