My children act the same way with their father. They will not tell him how they really feel. My children are 8 and 11. The 11 year old is upset everyday and he's the one my husband spends the most time with (baseball games and practice). We have been separated now for 3 months with no sign of a reconcillation but no divorce papers filed either. There is an OW too but she is married with children and she hasn't left her husband. Their affair is mostly through email but he has traveled to be with her.
I have said the same things to my children that I am so sorry that this has happened and that it is not something I wanted. All my H will say to the kids is remember when mommy and daddy would fight? I am not happy. Don't you want Daddy to be happy? My 11 year old said but Daddy we won't be happy without you living here. Did he even hear that?
I agree, when there are children involved and at least one person wants to try, divorce should be the last resort. But my H doesn't see it that way. He wants a new life. He has completely removed himself from any responsibility of the children except to play with them once in a while, to take my son to baseball practice and give us money to help with the bills but he doesn't ask about how they are doing in school or anything.
I know that I have the best of this deal. I get to be with my children and be their rock. But it is very difficult to witness their hurt and pain when I am still hurting too.
