Helo everyone. Decided I needed to post! My wife threw me a curve ball today. Here is the situation:

I have been quite detached and not thinking about working on my marriage...just living and being me and feeling pretty good. I have spent some time with my wife...but mostly at her invitation. She left a message Friday night while I was out. Called back Saturday morning, I was still sleeping . I called back when I got up and she then called again...asking me to come over. I did, we went shopping, made Christmas decorations with our daughter and then to the Santa Clause parade. It was fun...I went home right after the parade. My wife called again on Saturday night. This morning (Sunday), again she calls when I am still in bed. She was going grocery shopping and would call me when she came back. I was on the phone with my Mom when she just showed up on my door step!? We ended up going to brunch and I came home afterwards. She called AGAIN, in the afternoon..and threw me for a loop . "Would you like to spend Christmas Eve with my family...and participate in the gift exchange?".

WHAT?

I told her I would have to think about it and then asked her why I should. In short, I questioned her motives and motivation. Was it because she feels guilty and simply wants to aliviate some of that guilt? Was it because her parents had asked her? Or was because she wanted me there? I said I did not want to be a pity case or her quick fix (to her guilt I mean). She got a bit defensive, but when I explained my feelings to her...she understood...so she retracted her invitation . I said fine, did not want to ruin her evening, and that next time, she should really think about these things BEFORE inviting and then uninviting!!! She called back a half hour later...asked me to go to her parents for supper tonight and spend Christmas with them because YES she wanted me to be there. I accepted.

Her feelings have NOT changed...the marriage is over...but she keeps wanting to do things with me! This is not only a small thing either...why have I been invited? She said maybe this is a "transition" Christmas. And the future Christmas'? Her answer : "Who knows?

I felt good...I was in a very good place. Now? This has really screwed me up! Is it a baby step? Is it a sign? Should I even care? I didn't, before tonight!

Steph