Well, Santa didn't happen. I went to the rink but not on the ice. My wife had a hard time but it seemes ok. No hard feelings or anything. We then proceded to go to her place. Once there, she was complaining about a car parked in front of her laneway, about the construction, about our daughter being tired and tiring. I did not even go inside. Excused myself, said she and daughter looked tired and that we were perhaps flirting with disaster if we dragged her out to the Santa Clause parade. I told daughter I would take her next Saturday (there's another parade...this one in the evening, with lights and all ). My wife asked me if I was leaving because of her mood. I simply said they both seemed tired, said my goodbyes and left. In the afternoon and early evening, she called 3 times. At one point, I only took the dog out for 5 minutes, came back in and found a message on my phone...I listen to it, my wife wanted to tell me a funny story about our daughter. Before I could call her back, she called again and said "Didn't you get my message?" "Sure" I said, but hadn't even gotten the chance to call back.

So it seems she is calling for very small things, and I dont know why. I have stopped contacting her for these everyday things, and now she starts. I think she felt bad about her moddiness and wanted to see if that was the reason why I left. Or maybe she is trying to show me that now she is in a good mood. All I know is that removing myself from the situation is probably the best thing I could have done. It broke that pursuit cycle. I did not run after her to see what was bothering her and in so doing, I did not get involved in HER drama!

I'm gonna keep this up. The ball is truely in her court now. Tonight, I am going to the movies with a friend (yes, a woman friend). It's not a date, but she is a good friend and makes me feel good about myself and I get to go to the movies without worrying about how I act, what I say, how I act. I dont feel like I can truely be myself with my wife at the moment. I am a very touchy feely type of guy. All of my friends (men and women alike) get hugs and pats on the back, and goodbye kisses. This would not only be natural with my wife but with any friend. Friday night, I went out with a bunch of friends to celebrate a buddys B-day, and this fact hit me, that I just acted like me, gave and recieved hugs and kisses, being in a good mood, being me. I no longer have that with my wife. She tenses up, ractes in a negative fashion to any simple touch, and that adds to the stress, to the unatural feel of our time together.

Just babbling...probably coming off as a total freak here

Steph