My H is fond of saying "You are just the river that I fell into at a certain point in my life.". It would be really interesting to see if he would start making his own decisions if I left him or if he would just hurry up and find some new river of some kind in which to fall.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
My H is fond of saying "You are just the river that I fell into at a certain point in my life.".It would be really interesting to see if he would start making his own decisions if I left him or if he would just hurry up and find some new river of some kind in which to fall.
You could always push him. I know you're not supposed to return mean for mean, but damn he can be mean.
"Happiness is a butterfly, which, when pursued, is always just beyond your grasp, but which, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you."
When women approach, its because the guy is displaying certain attributes. I very very rarely initiate in a way that anyone observing could say... He approached her first. If I see something that piques my interest, I just put myself in proximity and 'turn on' a set of attributes. They are compelled to approach, and in their opinion, think they initiated. Once they do, then I immediately reassert, and seize ownership. They feel desire/protected/understood, not chased. Just like HP thinks she initiated. Her H may think she did too, but that doesnt make it so.
I never gave the 'who chose who' dynamic much thought since I've never had much experience in the area, but that's really interesting.
"Happiness is a butterfly, which, when pursued, is always just beyond your grasp, but which, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you."
You could always push him. I know you're not supposed to return mean for mean, but damn he can be mean.
I didn't even realize that this was a mean thing for him to say until I posted it on this BB a while ago and somebody informed me that it was. It just seemed like a true thing for him to be saying.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
MJ I certainly don't want to inspire negative feelings where there weren't any. But yeah, it sounded mean to me. You seem to handle his brutalities without missing a beat half the time. You're an amazing girl. Do you watch Grey's Anatomy? You remind me of Callie, or should I say Callie reminds me of you.
"Happiness is a butterfly, which, when pursued, is always just beyond your grasp, but which, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you."
Unfortunately, much of the explanation here is about women making themselves claimable. My wife would never do this. I don't think she has the self esteem to do it. There is some good stuff about the guy being silent, but confident and powerful. But it does require that the women be claimable, which I believe that most LD women are not.
I know you're not supposed to return mean for mean, but damn he can be mean.