Okay, now I'm not relating to your H at all. If I compare your lack of cooking with my H's lack of doing repair work around the house, I can't see how I might have discouraged him with negative comments. It was more like he constantly discouraged himself with negative comments and I was too wimpy to make it clear that I would prefer it if he would persevere in the face of "Where in the f*ck is the hammer?" or "I don't know how to do this sh*t." etc.. Maybe, your H is more like my MIL who wanted my FIL to do more for her around the house but was always complaining in a perfectionistic way about the way he did it so he never did it so my H never learned how from him. My FIL is super-handy man in his happier third! marriage.


"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver