It work out well for me, but I can see how it could not depending on what could have been said. Esentially I think because we have had " The Talk" before she was ready to have the same argument. That usually came down to "I don't feel like it". By saying " Ok you don't and I do what do you think I should do? " it kind of pushed her into a situation where I wasn't asking her to do anything infact she could not be part of the equation at all. There really is no good answear to that question and it could push someone into stating their marital sadism outloud (an issue for someone who would be striving to be right acting,thinking and speaking such as your wife).
"I don't know I need you to be patient" was the answear I got it could have been " find a lover ", " leave me alone " , " I don't care" or " just jerk off in the shower " I was asking for brutal honesty. Maybe the words I used didn't mean anything maybe it was just the tone of what I was saying. I think it was just enough of a different angle that it kind of shocked her out of our normal argument pattern.
" I have been patient I need to see effort on your part " she really undestood me in this context, promised to make the effort and has followed through for the most part.
