Sweet Ophelia - whatever you do, don't involve your mother-in-law. He specifically asked you not to upset her when you spoke to her last time, and I think that is indication enough that he's going to be very pi$$ed if you talk to her about it.
It's really not fair to put his mum in the middle of all of this and it certainly won't take you any closer to your goal of getting back together. She doesn't have the power to tell him what to do, like a naughty little boy.
The way to sensibly DB through this, even with lawyers involved, is to go along with it. You said yourself, it is no big deal really, you are happy to give him the pool table, you get to keep everything else - it's a no brainer.
If you retain a lawyer yourself, you are going to have legal fees (which are usually exhorbitant)and you are going to pi$$ your H off. This is no win-win situation.
Just relax and let it happen. You might be surprised by his reaction if he knows you are not going to fight with him. He is more likely to want to be your friend, if there is no conflict.
Right now, his actions are telling you that he wants you out of his life - you have to prove to him that you are someone he wants in his life.
List out your attributes, the things that make you desirable. To have a good partner, you need to be a good partner. Start you list simple and design it so that it has some goals. Try something like
My amazing desirable qualities (all goals are made up to illustrate the point)
Career: Currently I'm an xxx. Within the next 12 months I'm going to get promoted to the next level/or change career to xxx/or finish my degree/ or whatever to take you to the next career step.
Personal Fitness: I can currently walk/run 4 kms in 45 mintues. Within the next 12 months I'm going to be able to run 4 kms in 20 mins
Personality: I'm outgoing and fun. Within the next 12 months I'm going to have hosted 6 dinner parties, made 3 new friends and deepened my friendships with Bill, Dick and Harry etc.
Body Image:
Lesuire time pursuits:
Spirituality:
Family:
Your marriage didn't end over night, it took a long time to go down hill - it won't be restored overnight either. You need to do some work to make you into the best Ophelia you can be before you can realistically expect to have a healthy relationship with your H again.
Take care
V
Never make someone a priority, who makes you an option.
