-here is some perspective... -- you may already realize this...
Retrouvaille is great!!! I went and at the time it was the catalyst that sent our R in the right direction; however, it was not the magic bullet I thought it was...
Consider IT to be a major step in the positive direction BUT only a beginning AND only a piece of the puzzle -just one additional tool. Do not forget that you should always focus on what works AND continue to find solutions... Dialog WORKS when you and H both want to do it -- IF you push dialog then it may not work, in essence DBing is still required and finding the best ways to get H to continue to dialog may be necessary in addition to best methods to get H to continue attending post sessions etc. etc. -continue wearing your DB hat AND doing what works... Also, you will find out much about what H feels, likes, dislikes etc through dialog -YES it is good to know this stuff BUT do not stop there, continue working on you and finding solutions to problems etc.
Retrouvaille gave you better communication & renewed commitment BUT remember that some of the underlying issues that got you here are still there and are potential pitfalls until dealt with...
-not trying to rain on your parade -just handing you an umbrella for two!
