don't get it! Help!

[kissak]

Thanks Cat, It does seem like that is him. But, what do I need to be doing? He blames his unhappiness on me. The only reasons I get is things like, not keeping dishes washed and laundry kept up. Hello! I worked a 9 to 5 job too and take care of our 2 kids! He also said I didn't give him affection when he desired it. How can I show him the affection now when he won't let me be close to him? I noticed him staring at me during our dinner together with kids on Sunday, I don't now what he was thinking. I do feel like when he is around me he misses me, but when he is not around me, he doesn't even think about me. He told me 10 yrs ago when we had only been married a couple of yrs and we separated for 6 weeks, that he missed me when we were together, but when we were apart he didn't. Make any sense? His brain is like a honeycomb, he thinks about only one section of his life at a time, never sees the big picture. When he is with me, he thinks of me, when he is with OW, he thinks of her and not me...see the pattern? How do I get him to see the big picture and what effect this is having on our children? How long do emotional affairs last for retarted men!? I wonder if him seeing me with another man would jar him any. I have NEVER given him any reason to be jealous and I wonder what this would do to him.