I feel weird posting this topic but need help in this area. My husband and I have been together for 4.5 years now. I am 7 years older than he is and had two children from a previous marriage and him and I have a 22 month old together. The child we had together was born with Down syndrome so that was difficult at first but we came through the hard part and are now trying for another child (DS or not). He is a wonderful husband and tries so hard in every way to be a good partner. We are best friends and talk about everything (except our one problem) and rarely argue. He is a better communicator than I am and helps me to be a better one when I shut down. The only problem we seem to have it sex. When we first started dating he was such a gentleman and never tried a thing. After a while I wondered if he ever would and had to make the first move. It has been that way ever since. He has never had to be the initiator in any of his relationships and all of them were long term. He thinks it is the womans job to do that and feels foolish doing it. I stopped trying after a while to see if he would do it and only occasionally will he do it and it is so suttle that sometimes I don't realize that he is flirting or initiating. The other problem he is just not a good kisser and that is a problem for me. He seems to not be able to focus on more than one thing at a time. If he is trying to kiss he does alright but if he is trying to do more he is super sloppy and stiff. He sticks his tongue out and can't move it right and he slobbers on me (gross). I love him but it makes it hard to be intimate when all I think about it how gross the kiss will be and I need to kiss to become and stay aroused. I have told him once that he needs to slow down and not kiss so hard and I did it in a nice way by complimenting the one time he did ok but he took it harshly and sometimes jokes about he does not want to kiss me wrong. I would feel horrible about telling him that he is a crappy kisser so what do I do?
