Going through MLC is very similar to going through the Grief Process.
It does not have a set timeline nor does it have a set pattern. No two people grieve exactly alike and no two people go through MLC exactly the same way.
Some go through MLC faster and smoother some go through with many experiences that create damage to relationships and careers, and some never leave the MLC experience.
There is no way that I am aware of in telling where a person is at and how long before they leave MLC. They can go through a certain part of the experience and down the road go back and relive that experience all over again.
Only you can decide on how long to hold onto hope. If it will take another 5 years for your H to get through this, will you wait? How about 10 years?
There is talk about the average being between 3-5 years. It's like telling a person that they have between 3-5 years left to live after being diagnosed with cancer.
There are always the extremes where some may die within 3 months and some will live for 20+ years and everything in between.
My sense is, that the longer the MLC lasts, the lower the % of success stories.
I say this for one major reason. The LBS grows tired of living their life waiting and hoping for a miracle to happen.
Their comes a point where the LBS decides it's time to "move on" with their life. This "moving on" can mean different things to different people.
For some it means closing the door to the possibility of a future reconciliation. To others, it means to get on with ones live and enjoy everday and all the beauty of life itself. They let go of all expectations and move forward open to all possibilities.
There are unlimited possibilites when one is open to whatever life brings. There are limited possibilities when one holds on to only a certain outcome as the only option.
Whatever you decide will be right for you. No one can tell you when is the right time to "let go" or that you should hold out for getting back together with your H.
I hope this helps in thinking through what is best for you.
