I bother because I value the input and good advice I get from This site so I'm sorry I just got fed up with being told I had not forgiven my wife and being accused of being a serial wife beater. It happened once. It was by for the worst thing I have ever done in my life and I have asked my Lord an Saviour for forgiveness so I'm happy its at an end.
<<<<< UPDATE >>>>>>
She is moving back Sunday. It was going to be Sat but she has wriggled another day's freedom for herself. We both know its going to be hard. For my part I have to work harder as I've not worked much due to the stress and y depression, which actually hardly makes me an attractive proposition for my wife so from Monday things are going to be different. The plan is for me to pay off the debts within 2 years if possible, which is going to be bloody hard as they currently stand at �28k all unsecured (21k is on credit cards).
For her part she comes home because of the finances. She absolutely does not want to but having lived through a bankruptcy before she is terrified of going through it again and of course she realizes she will not be housed in a flat but will have to go into bed and breakfast with a load of drug users etc. She seems to have enough sense left at the moment to spare our little boy from that.
SHE IS NOT GOING TO TRY AND FIX OUR MARRIAGE. ABSOLUTELY REFUSES. DOES NOT LOVE ME BLAH BLAH SAME OLD RECORD.
AND
UNFORTUNATELY......... SHE IS STILL SEEING HIM... HAS ALLUDED TO THE FACT AND ONE OF OUR DEAR FRIENDS WHO HAS AN OLDER SON AT OUR SCHOOL SAW HER KISSING HIM PASSIONATELY IN HIS CAR THIS MORNING. THEY WERE IN THE CAR PARK NEXT TO THE SCHOOL.
So THE AF is on again just as before before it all came out. I have to pretend I don't know or say I know but want it to stop without threatening and without it becoming THE issue. Any advice please as were in the same house again like Simon's situation.
All I can do I suppose is GAL get mysterious and show her patience and love. Hopefully she will snap out of it before we clear our depts and the OM thing will fizzle out. There is nothing I can do about it anyway. Maybe in a year I'll be able to let her go to make her own mistakes, who knows. Now its back to DBing and getting my life in order.
Wish me luck. All my friends think I've had the patience of a saint. I think I'm gonna need a lot more than that this time.
Nick
me 41 her 40 kids (3) 19, 16 and 6 married 20 years, together 31 years since childhood
bomb Aug 06, affair started june 06 and still going on
