At the moment you just need to take one day at a time, do you have many friends that you can talk to?, maybe you should get your wife to look after the children while you go out and do something for yourself. I have found that the worst thing for me is to just sit around the house and do nothing because it just gets me thinking all the more about everything.
It is hardly disasterous if you do not manage to get your cleaning done today, but you do need to make sure that your children are ok. They are also going through a very difficult time, and they are going to need you to stay strong.
My husband also after 10 years of adoring me out of the blue said that he felt empty, did not love me. I never even got the ILYBINILWY speech, he just felt empty. We went through years of IVF to get our D2 and that is all i got. At the moment like your wife my husband is besotted with the OW, the newness and excitement, but us rationally thinking people realise that those feelings can not be sustained forever and eventually my husband will understand this.
Try writing somethings down that you would like to do for you, is there a hobby or something that have always wanted to do?. Then try and make it happen. Think about the person you were when your wife met you, she fell in love with you then. Show her by your actions that you can be that person again. However you need to do these things more so for you than for your wife.
I actually think that you could look at your wife moving out as a positive thing, because like i have said it gives you both the much needed time and space. The OM will not be anywhere near the man that you are. My husband has affaired down, so many people have said that she is not as attractive as me, and not blowing my own trumpet but even i can see that. So try and stop worrying about these things and channel your energy in a more productive way, what can you do for you and your children today that will put a smile on all your faces?. Your wife wont be smiling much as time goes on and when she sees that you and your children are smiling and enjoying life she will start to miss you all.
So please take care of you and your children.
Nicky
Me 34 H 33 D3 together 10 years married 2 years Bomb 22/8/06 (I feel empty) OW involved
