Your right of course but it hurts so much. Not knowing who he is, knowing what he looks like is driving me mad. I need to see him not to confront him or anything like that I just need to know what he looks like. I need closure. Its part of understanding why she chose him. Does he look similar to me? What does he do. What is it about him that drew my wife to him like a moth to a flame?
She said she finished it just before Christmas because she could not cope with it anymore. I know she is gong through a mid life crisis at least I hope she is because she is so believable when she says she feels nothing for me and that she never will.
When I brought the affair into the open she flatly denied it. I felt stupid and was even going to back down but stood my ground and she finally admitted it. I cant beleive she let me spend �2000 on a holiday to try and heal our marriage and she was shagging some bloke at the same time.
She has changed so much. She used to have such a beautiful spirit. She was so giving and kind now she's a monster. A monster I love with all of my heart. I am having such a hard time getting through the days. I've got to clean and do laundry as well as feed my other 2 kids and I'm failing terribly.
I've been on anti depressants for 2 months and was finally coming out of it. After seeing my doctor I realized I had been depressed all my adult life. I was hoping and praying she would see the real me through her fog. A person emerging from my depression. Someone who she could love again. Why is it so hard and why is she so cruel.
me 41 her 40 kids (3) 19, 16 and 6 married 20 years, together 31 years since childhood
bomb Aug 06, affair started june 06 and still going on
