He said he's seeing someone new

[Ophelia]

The thing of it is, there are actually a couple of potentials who I think she may be. People I've met a few times. People I know he hangs around with alot. I think if I didn't have potential suspects already in mind, I wouldn't need (want) to know so bad.

You're probably right, it'd probably just make me feel worse in the long run, but I don't know how to stop wondering if I'm right about who she is.

Damn me and my overactive imagination!

I'm also stressing a bit that as I'm leaving the BBQ on Friday, he might be driving down the street and if he's taking her with him, then I might go right past them.

Then I think that H will most likely be waiting for a txt from the host of the BBQ telling him I'm gone before he shows up. Having him go to such lengths to avoid being anywhere near me is so depressing, and is doing a damn fine job of chipping away at the hope I'm still clinging to that we can resolve this mess some day.

Everytime I think of how much this is putting my family through, I just feel sick....and I've gotta stop feeling sick, because when I feel sick I can't eat, so I haven't actually had a decent meal since Friday, which isn't a good thing.