He said he's seeing someone new

[Astimegoeson]

Ophelia, you ask the same question so many of us ask... Why? You've already answered some of that question by looking at yourself and realizing you may have had problems communicating affectively with him. This is good that your willing to take responsibility for your part in this. He's partially responsible as well, but he's probably not considering his part in this now, otherwise he would be showing some remorse. There may be questions you won't get answers to. I'm still asking questions myself after 18 months, but I'm resigned to the fact I may never get them, but that's OK, closure is still possible for me. I did everything I could do to save my marriage and I'm sure you have/will do the same. That will give you some peace of mind when all is said and done.

There's not always an answer to every question or an explanation for the negative experiences in our lives. Some things just happen for no reason that's clear to us.

Your H isn't going to be able to "write off" 10 years. You left a mark on him that he'll eventually have to reconcile with. He's just going to take his issues into a new relationship.

I'm a strong believer in what goes around, comes around and he's eventually going to feel the pain he's dishing out and when that time comes, he'll have to deal with it and realize what he's done to you.