I'm at a point in my life where I'm slowly but surely writing the next chapter...there have been some settlement and D setbacks/frustrations, but I can do it.....I feel very good about myself!
"I am focused on what I am after. The key to the next open chapter. I found a way to steal the sun from the sky. Long live the day, that I decided to fly from the inside."
Recap: Me: 34 W: 39 (Parents D when she was 9) M: 13 1/2 years (together 16 years) Children: D11, D9, D 6, S4
Bombs March 26, 2006 (Just 2 days after my birthday!)
July 10, 2006 - EA with xBIL (just D my Sis final mid June 2006). W says she wants to D so she can pursue R/PA with xBIL. W hinted at wanting to do this back in April 2006...
September 5, 2006 - "You want me to serve you with D papers via mail or have a sheriff come to your work and serve you..."
D Papers served via mail on 9/28/06
W cornered by children about D. W told them without me present late on Sunday night 10 pm. Kids were sleeping when I got home from Grocery store. W never even called me - just told me when I came home. D10 fell asleep with a box of tissues on her pillow... W never even apologized for this.
Saw paper laying in Ws room with XBIL 3 initials and her 3 initials EXCEPT her last initial (last name) changed to match that of xBILs. It was some sort of a computer password???
xBIL is Godparent to D10. W and I are Godparents to xBIL/Sis S7.
Currently: Me living in family home. W rarely sleeps at the house. Most of the time, she drives to her Dad's (25 miles away) or stays with XBIL (10 miles away) after work ~12 am and then drives back home in the morning by 7 am so I can go to work. W works full time. I do nearly everything at my home - parent, clean, cook, laundry, lawn, etc...
Ws Last Statements Regarding M: "If you want to get this over with as fast as possible so we can move on, we should get everything done before pretrial. My L said she could hurry it up possibly...."
Also STBXW stated just how much the kids are going to love that she is going to marry XBIL....
My Last Response to W regarding M: "I have no reason to delay this..."
Positive Steps: She did make comments on 12/7/06 about how she isn't really okay that she doesn't see her kids that much right now. But feels like this is what she needs to do so one of us is always with the kids. Also said "I have never been a flake in my kids lives and I don't intend to be...............but you may disagree with me on that." LOL
Positive steps for me: With every day, I began to feel better and better as I detached. And while I will never say that my M was all bad, the last several years dealing with her Depression and low self-esteem was tiring.... I am happier in my life now than ever. I am going out meeting new people and enjoying my life. I started dating someone recently....
Behavior of all children seems to be affected a bit by the in home changes. Since Bomb - have worked to become the best Dad to them - utilizing my Children's LL as part of the process.
Personal Mantras: "I am not my Ws problem. Therefore, I cannot be the solution for my W."
"Let Go and Let God"
Feel free to comment, provide insight, and most of all pray.
