I am sorry you too such great offense to my posting...it has been something on my mind for sometime and after my own personal experience I wanted to discuss it here...and just because of the open person I am I will let you know (perhaps this was your intent, I don't know) that the attack did hurt my feelings....and it was directed right at me....I may say things that come out wrong but I would never attack anyone purposely as you did....but again...I am sorry that you felt so insulted and justified that you came at me over this...
To Lissett and David....I am not suggesting that you stop your fun flirting....I know how it makes one feel good...
My thoughts were more on when it gets taken off of this board...out of the "public eye" so to speak that things can go farther then possibly one or both ever intended...I have seen IRL persons give up the fight part way through because they fell for someone else....or thought they did....to me this is sad and a reason to use extreme caution with getting too personal and too close....especially when we are reaching out to a drowning person....I did Jr. Lifeguard work and on a few occasions at the beach I did perform rescues on my own (because no one was around)....the most dangerous thing is to physically and personally reach out to a drowning person....they will take you down in a second trying to save themselves....not that they WANT to...it is survival...put two drowning persons together and you can see where the problem comes in....
Taking this to the next step....if one person is in a life boat....and they see another drowning....it is much safer for them to go over and extend a hand...or throw them a rope....they can then help to save each other....yet continue on their own journey....
I hope this makes a bit more sense about what I was talking about...I truly care about everyone here....my heart breaks when I see a new name appear.....I have cried real tears reading posts because I know the pain, fear, anxiety....I know the feeling....and it hurts....that is why I post....I feel I am in a life boat right now....I feel that I can throw a rope or reach out to others and help them.....
I think FaithfulH got what I was getting at...that we have to be careful to finish our OWN journey....because while we do all come here because of the journey that our mates decided to start down....we soon realize (or should) that it comes down to us...
Just this week I had a heart to heart with my H concerning my own personal situation....it raised a lot of discussion with my H even to the point that we both went to see our church elder for advice and comfort....I felt badly that I had come so close to straying(for me personally, dating before the actual Divorce is not right...I understand that for others separation is enough and I am not judging anyone but my self)....my H totally understood and even added that had I actually committed adultery....he would have understood.....he knew how lonely I was....he was however, relieved that for my own spiritual well being that I didn't....for me I am greatful because I do really love my H and would feel deep guilt for giving up too soon....even if we would have reconciled after the fact...I would have felt I bailed on my journey....
Again, Scooter I am sorry....and everyone else thank you for your understanding....
BTW....I was not referring to anyone specifically in my post....and certainly not to the man that I personally met...I don't think he comes here or at least hasn't in well over a year....he has recently met someone he is interested in....it has been 5-6 years for him so I am very happy for him and he knows this....We have kept in touch but not in a romantic way... but in a friendship way....he was happy for my reconciling with my H....I was sad his M ended in D....but from all he told me about his situation and his W (now X)I felt that he would complete his journey alone....and I am glad to say that he is taking a very different approach to this possible new relationship then he would have previously... which just confirms to me even more that he and I were doing something that neither of us was really prepared for...
