I have no worries over you at all. You are at your best in times of crisis and while it seems like you are hanging on a thread, I believe you are actually hanging on a steel cable. It is because you believe you are hanging by a thread that he thread becomes a cable.
It is when things seem to be under control and you believe that you aren't even hanging at all that you are really dangling on a thread. Those are the times when there is nothing to fight and no reason to keep up the walls, when you think you are safe, that you think you may have to show some vulnerability, those are the times when you are really hanging by a thread, because your pattern seems to be that in those times your anxiety attacks kick in.
I think there might be a compliment in there somewhere, I'm not sure.
Actually, I'm vulnerable all over the place right now, and that is what I was talking about when I said 'hanging by a thread.' I'm even letting my friends and family and everyone SEE it. Were this the old me, I'd be giving Superman a run for his money. But my 'leaping tall buildings in a single bound' days are over...
My natural response to stuff like this is to go all Hermit like, pull away from the world, hold everything inside and refuse any help or comfort when it comes my way.
I'm not doing that right now, believe it or not, and it is exceedingly uncomfortable for me. I've let people see me cry and be weak, I've let them hug me and baby me (ugh), I'm not solving all the problems on my own...
But the impulse to do just the opposite is there, right below the surface.
I don't want to dissolve into a simpering whimp who becomes overly dependent on people, either. I'm working on keeping things in perspective, not blowing things out of proportion, not overly fretting, and not making mountains out of mole hills. There is no reason for me to charge into battle, for no battle exists. I'm just darn proud of the fact that I can actually SEE that... as I am so fond of saying, you can't see what you can't see, until you do.
