But you still haven't explained to us why you are here on the boards. I've read your posts, but nothing in them seems to answer clearly why you are here.
Honestly, I have compassion for you. But you are clearly SEEKING something here. Something that your therapist is NOT giving you.
Like I said, nothing in psychology is accidental. And I stand by a lot of what I've said. Yes, I don't know you, but as people, we're not that different from one another.
You NEED something from the boards. WHAT IS IT? And don't give me scattered stuff like "he wont's stop lying to his W". Why are you with a liar then? Weird.
And boy are you antagonistic. Where is all this anger coming from?
And having a "good" relationship with you father doesn't mean that on some sub-conscious level you're still not hurt. Remember the sub-conscious is very powerful and all our conscious behavior is propelled by our sub-conscious.
Good luck to you again.
Rainbow, I am here as I explained because, his wife insisted on trying this Divorce Busting before they divorce. I heard a few negative things about this book, so I decided to look into it. I read the book, some of it I agree with, some I don't. And I'm not even applying it to their situation, just in general. I believe this could be a good preventative book to avoid problems in relationships that might lead to divorce. But I don't agree with the 180, the in dark, or whatever that is, it's not genuine. As a psychology major, you might agree that people are what they are, they are years of their environment and history. You can't change that, and if that's what affects their behavior, you can't change what you are. the attept to "act" different, is just that, an act. I wanted to see what the mindset of the people were who read this book, that's all, and after reading quite a bit, decided to post. Which I'm sorry I did. THAT was what I was seeking. As far as being Antagonistic or angry, I've been attacked all morning by people who don't know me or my situation and honestly, I think I've handled myself quite well under the circumstances. My mistake was probably voicing my opinion. I have read about all the people whose spouses lie to them and I do have compassion, just like I do for her, and I don't think it's right to continue this game, but that is his choice. I read, he's still carrying on, he's hiding, deleting text messages, changing passwords, yeah, he is, it's NOT right. He thinks he's doing it for the right reasons, but lying is wrong no matter how you slice it. So that is my point, that was what I was looking for here. And I'm not saying my parent's divorce didn't hurt, but they were much better parents separately than they were together, it was the right thing for them to divorce. Sorry to have been so harsh, I"ve been attacked all day, my mistake was posting in the first place, I knew I wouldn't be popular but I wanted to speak my mind and but I didn't realize I was going to be attacked. Stupid me. So I apoligize, and I won't be posting. Since I started writing this, I see more criticism from you but I'm not going to address it. I will go to TOW website. I was not trying to antagonize anyone for trying to save their marriage, I thoughtI was clear about that. Does anyone remember Oprah and her The Horse is Dead...Get off. Sometimes you have to realize the horse is dead and get off it, because it's not going to take you anywhere. Not every marriage should be saved. Good luck to all of you.
