This may sound very callous and I'm sorry for that.
Your husband's possible OW does not matter. It doesn't matter to you. You are a beautiful strong woman, able to accomplish her goals, without some crutch of a man around to hold onto.
That is a very attractive quality. However, for it to be noticed, it must be believed. It must be believed by YOU!
Head high, shoulders back, chest out. Away you go. You can take on the world, and you will if you have to.
Let the Passive Aggressiveness accusation roll off you like water off a duck's back. Treat it like you are a 7 year old on the playground. "I know you are, but what am I???" and "I'm made of rubber, you're made of glue, words bounce off me and stick to you" and if you in your imagination stick your tongue out and cross your eyes while he's saying it, it'll go down a lot better!
So....he wants a divorce! Jeepers!!!! What a surprise!!!! They all do. Everyone of them. And they all have friends who may or may not be pushing them. Everyone of them. And they all have OW who may or may not be pushing them.
The only thing for you to focus on or even think about is you. What do you do for you. If you don't want a divorce, then you don't. When you decide you're ready, you'll proceed. I told my twit of a husband that I was still discussing it with the lawyers. Everytime he'd ask about anything.
"Are you going to pay this bill?" I'm discussing it with the lawyers.
"Why are you being such a b*tch?" I'm discussing it with the lawyers.
"Why don't you answer the phone??" I'm discussing it with the lawyers.
Very general. Very unarguable.
Give it a try. And darkness, sweetie? Darkness will help you so much. It's an amazing tonic for our ills. You'll have to trust me until you try it.
They all do. Everyone of them. And they all have friends who may or may not be pushing them. Everyone of them. And they all have OW who may or may not be pushing them. 