Remember, alot of what you hear is coming from guilt. They probably don't actually believe their justifications any more than you do. They have to keep vocalizing their reasons both to you and to themselves, otherwise they have to accept full responsibility for what they've done.
Strangely enough, I think that the more they care about us, the more they will even try to hide the OM, or OW. They know they have hurt us. They more they care, the more guilt they will feel ..... get it ?
I also think that guilt is one of, if not the primary reason, that they find it so hard to come back to us after an affair. Again, it's guilt. They can't face either us, or themselves after what they've done. Better just to never have to face it. This is why forgiveness is so important if we ever hope they will return. Honest forgiveness both within ourselves, and themselves.
