something I have noticed, when I am silent and I mean totaly silent, h will start talking, talking and talking sometimes to the point where I am saying to myself where did this all come from, now I don't mean talking in the manner of any r talk, just talk, talking about work the jobs he has to do, what the guys are working on, the threat of snow bla bla bla all kinds of things. I like to listen to him, always wanted to hear about his day and what was going on, he stopped doing that and now wammo. it's almost shocking. I think h has realized that his being overly sexual is making me uncomfortable (at least for now) so he's backed off a bit. he's still being physically affectionate but it's more affection than sex. he just left to get some chinese for us and I was folding laundry while he was changing his stuff from the washer to the dryer (he has been doing his own since the sep, was taking it to a wash & fold but the past few weeks he's been doing it here, I'm staying away from it) he came back in and kissed the back of my neck. one of the things h mentioned about being in love feelings was knowing that when you talk the other is listening, well since I was always talking (out of my own discomfort) h never had an opportunity to talk and often even when he would I would somehow end up leading his conversation, so now I just listen and comment here or there if i can say something small, letting him talk and be heard, letting him share his day. there is a time for me to listen and there is a time for me to talk, when h talks i need to listen. knowing that the less i say the more h will talk will be enough to keep me from talking.
the sit still bothers me, I am still not comfortable, but I am learning to make h comfortable and when he is comfortable and I see that smile I feel better. LL
