Well, here I am... back after another long hiatus. Things have been going downhill very slowly. Had an MC session today that just about killed me. W is quite down on the R, and has now said she "knows" things have no chance of getting better (vs earlier statements of "thinking" things have no chance).
W's bday is coming up this month. She's just said she'd like to fly out of town to get away from everything. There's been a lot of family stress (her family) lately, and she has always had issues with not liking her bday, and I understand the need. But, I firmly believe she'll take the opportunity to be with OM. I know she's looking for some "approval" from me or my help in saying I'll be fine with watching our girls that weekend. But, if she's going to see OM, I don't want to play any part in enabling that relationship. I would, of course, very much like to tell her "no, you can't go if that's the case." But, as I've learned, I do not control her - only she does. So, I plan on asking her point blank if she plans on meeting up with OM there. If she is, I plan on saying something like "I will not be an enabler for your relationship with him. I will gladly take care of our girls in your absense, because I am their father, but your choice to leave us to go be with him is solely your decision." As far as I know, she has yet to lie to a direct question (wish I asked more of them), so I feel that she would answer me honestly here. I don't know whether or not to lead with that question, as I do want her to understand I have no problem with her going on her own; but, I can't quietly ignore the fact I believe she has such plans, and I can't have it not stated, as I usually do.
