Dr. Lauras book does not address the HD female/LD male situation. Her techniques will NOT work for them.
But lets look at the typical HD man/LD female problem. There are 2 solutions, Deida's and Dr. Laura's. Here they are: Deida - HD Man changes then LD women (possibly) changes. Dr. Laura - LD woman changes which CAUSES HD man to change.
Deida AND Dr. Laura both agree that if HD man changes, there is NO direct force on the woman to change. It is STILL her decision. But Dr. Laura also recognizes that HD men are chemically driven by testosterone. Women HAVE no equal to this. So her solution goes WITH nature, by using the full effects of testosterone. When you go the other way, the man is FIGHTING nature, their is no chemical equivalent in women that drives her like testosterone drive a HD male. Please tell me what drives a woman so hard that she would be willing to change ANYTHING about herself to get it. So Deidas solutions require consious decisions by both parties while Dr. Lauras requires only the FEMALE to make consious decisions. The man automatically responds in a Deida like fashion.
Also, if you look at any possible solution, the critical step is that the the woman MUST implement Dr. Laura's strategy (meaning becoming higher in desire). If the women does NOT implement Dr. Laura's strategy in some way, then no positive solution is possible.
So what all of us guys are doing is basically just trying to make ourselves appealing enough for the women to actually start the REAL work of changing themselves. If the women does not change herself, then what us guys do really has no effect on our CURRENT relationship.
I am not trying to say Deida's book is bad, I think it has some very good points. But from the way he has written the book, it seems clear that he expects little success in fixing SSM's. It seems to me that it might help with LD women, but for ND women, or women that have the desire follows arrousal complex, then what ever the man does is really not even a consideration. We could be the most alpha male ever and these women are NOT going to repsond the way they should.
