The Superior Man?

[Burgbud]

1) The man must develop a primary purpose in life that is NOT his wife or marriage.

I think he'd probably phrase it as the man *has* a primary purpose in life that is NOT his wife or marriage and that if he hasn't discovered it, he needs to.

Makes sense, right? If the man doesn't have the tools to make the relationship work why would he make it his primary purpose? That would be an exercise in futility.


2) The man must consider his wife "disposable", meaning that if she can not provide what he needs, he just moves on.

The man must pursue his purpose whether his wife is meeting his needs or not. He's not required to dispose of her.


3) That women effectively want men that don't want them (needy).

Women want men that don't need them (a concept repeated in a thousand other books). Women want men to lead the relationship (what "leading" entails is a topic for another thread). Women are needy for masculine energy.

TWotSM dovetails nicely with John Eldredge's Wild at Heart (hey to Lil), imo. Eldredge writes from a Christian perspective and says a man needs a battle to fight, a beauty to rescue and an adventure to live. Both authors say a man often seeks something from a woman that she can never give him (his masculinity). Eldredge says you have to get that from God and Deida essentially says you give it to yourself ("realize that you already have what you seek").

Like Dr. Laura, both TWofSM and WaH can be offputting due to the authors' styles and POVs. If you read any of this, you'll take from it what you're open to and ready for.