cemar - i think you are right, but there is no possible way that i can illustrate this to her at this point. she is absolutely and completely convinced they are MY demons. i don't think either of us are entirely at fault - i think we have both contributed to this problem. only now i have made a stand and brought marriage into the equation. a decision, she says 'that was the worst possible thing i could do' for us. i can't cave at this point. there's no going back. it's all on the table.
