Not really. I think you gauging your telephone calls is good. You seem to have a better understanding of how many, or how few, calls to make to get his attention in the right way.
Clearly staying on a path of self-improvement has done wonders for you. I can imagine how difficult it is to try and DB when there's no "real" reason for your H to be around. For me, I have my W at home because we have kids. Even if she wasn't at home, I'd see her frequently because of the kids. Naturally, each visit is an opportunity to DB.
Have you considered going and seeing him? It seems like he comes to see you all of the time (or am I reading this incorrectly?). What if you made a visit out where he is because you have some "errands" to run or something? I know you don't want to pursue too hard, so I'm not sure you'd want to do this. Also, is there anything in particular he's said to you in the past that he likes that you could do when you see him? For example, a favorite outfit, a particular perfume, some home baked brownies, etc. I would think that without coming on too strong, the few times you do see him, you have to remind him of the positive things in your R in the past...those things he's always liked.
What are his hobbies? Does he have a particular interest in something you know little about? Maybe research it, so when you talk to him on the phone you have something in common to talk about...that will draw him closer.
I'm just throwing things out there, PNT, so take what I'm saying with a grain of salt.
