Play Devil's advocate all you want...just don't turn into Keanu Reeves!
My crying. Yes, I'm concerned that in the long run that will backfire on me.
I'm afraid that you are right and I'll end up back in this spot in another year, hearing him say, "Well, you called me up all crying asking me to move to athens, I did it for you, not for me." Oy.
I'm not quite sure what to think about it, except that I NEEDED to cry this out with him hearing how hurt I was. This is sort of a 180 from the past few months. I have tried to make sure to always be upbeat and perky when talking to him on the phone. I will admit that I cried on our date...but he started it!! He cried first!!
I've been thinking things over and I guess I should point to the positive signs that I had along the way that allowed me to have this outburst without completely fearing that he'd shut down.
The past few months when I'd get upset or sad, he would respond very quickly by calling me back whether I been upset on the phone or in an email. He'd comfort me.
He told me that he loved me.
He did say that he wanted to work on our marriage, but he wanted to get a job first.
He confessed his fear of having things return to the old way.
He said that he would be back with me in a heartbeat if he could figure out how to turn the bad into good.
So, I had all these little things to subconciously tell me that it might be ok to tell him how I was feeling.
However, I really was at the point where if he did respond badly, that I wouldn't be able to continue my efforts. So, in that sense, I felt that he had the right to know that I was getting to the 'point of no return.'
